Don’t Leave Home WIT(hout) it!

If I recall right, AMEX Credit Cards used to have this seminal tagline ‘ Don’t Leave Home Without It ‘ coined by advertising great David Ogilvy. But your visa to a perfect quip or comeback after it didn’t matter—a minute, hour, or day after one of your conversations has ended? Yes, you got it. The best master card up your sleeve – WIT.

No need for WIThdrawal symptoms. You’re not doomed to sit by as ‘clever’ companions exchange sharp banter. You can practice being wittier, improving your reaction times and ability to land a jab or joke at just the right moment. Jokes don’t warrant social distancing. That was CoWIT talking.

Unlike perceived, WIT isn’t just for some gifted linguists. Playing with language—elevating mundane communication from mere talk into a creative process—is a form of innovation that sheds new light on old ideas. Plus, vitally, it makes life less boring and more fun for you and others. So, in short, we can all get better at being ‘ clever ‘.

Just as those highly skilled auto drivers on Bombay roads, if you can turn around (just like they do on a 6 cm radius!) words and phrases in the mind and present new juxtapositions, one can change the way we and other people see. Yes, it’s the road less travelled. But worth taking. So, get on WIT(h) it!

The wittiest among us are simply people who make unusual connections between words and ideas. And never verse off for it. Observations- Refreshed. Surprised!

In cognitive terms, the brain of the wit is less inhibited than that of a linguistic dullard. In other words, fairly, well ventilated shall we say? Are you WIT(h) me? Unabashed, uncensored access to associations, conscious and unconscious, is essential to wit. Apologies, people with brain damage don’t qualify!

The caudate nucleus is one area( 2 kms south of Mira Road..just kidding) of the brain implicated in associative learning and control of inhibitions that may explain how wit is generated. Likewise, the frontotemporal region( east of Kandahar..by now you know!) influences personality, language, and emotional development. Knowing precisely how these areas of the brain interact and regulate thinking will lead to better ‘ scientific comprehension of wit ‘. That is if you really are bothered about all of this in the first place.

So, if you are looking at a guide to ‘ advanced banter ‘, don’t wait for a breakthrough in brain science to cultiWEIGHT wit. (W)It’s reasonably simple. Just knowing that wit is a kind of associative process already makes you better equipped to be a verbal gymnast. The variety of the play of wit manifests through—puns( tumhee pun na!!), rhyme, metaphor, slang, rap(chick), to name a few.

The encouraging thing to understand here is that being creative about language can be mastered with practice. It’s not all natural talent. If you make peace with history and take a piece of it, in analyzing how wit arises or why we might rely on it, the oldest and most revered texts in the world, from the Tao Te Ching(nothing to do with what Neena Gupta endorses) to the Bible to the plays of William Shakespeare are replete with language play. When all the world is a rage, wit has a role to play. Perhaps on centre stage?

With linguistic gymnastics, we can reach people who might not otherwise think they’re interested in certain ideas and break down barriers. Hip-hop and rap, for example, exposed generations of music listeners of all classes and races to black culture they didn’t encounter in their own lives. (And Shakira has taught us that hips don’t lie). Wit’s an efficient way to say more with less, as in the case of a metaphor, or to expose unexpected mean ink, alternately meaning.

Wit is the antidote for a culture being dulled by communication overload—it’s a kind of wisdom. In Aristotle’s words, it is a form of “ educated insolence. ” If we were cracking wise, rather than vice versa ie reacting angrily, and being wittier(or Twittier?) on Twitter, we might all have a much better time.The rate of exchange between strangers and acquaintances online has never been so high(BSE/NASDAQ/FTSE etc please take note). But internet chatter is often toxic and commonly resorts to vitriolic retorts( would have preferred witriolic), angry declarations, and unnecessary observations. Wish that closed minds came with closed mouths. Hence, so many of us feel we are at our wit’s end.

You too can be a master of verbal jousting. Take the WITness stand. It is time to unleash the power WIThin!
Be at home WIT(h) it. But, don’t leave home WIT(hout) it.
(WIT’s) END
WIT AL PART ILL
Dubai

Something is just not not WRITE!

One more of the (Jest)in beaver rants!
 
You can pretend to play the guitar. What one calls the Air Guitar– Sure, you can!
 
But, you can’t pretend to play the Air Guitar. Can you?
 
But this rant is coming with no strings attached. The IPL 2021 is upon us. Under six months of the curtains coming down on the previous edition. Yes, it has come thick and fast.
 
The sport light here in this ‘ peace de assistance ‘ is on ex India cricketer Mohammed Kaif. Now part of the Coaching staff of the team Delhi Capitals as Assistant Coach. All through the IPL 2020 campaign, i.e. around the 16 odd matches that Delhi Capitals played (including the finals against Mumbai Indians), he carried his customary spirited, committed, effervescent attitude. What we also noticed was he always carried a notebook with him. Every single match. Probably all 300 pages of it. After all, observations, insights, learnings etc have to be recorded. Competitive sport is as much about what happens outside the playing field as it is about what happens on it.
 
But, if you were to be Rajat ( or Sharma) or Scholar or Navneet or Apsara (or Pari) or any of the other stationery brands that make these notebooks, you would be very worried. They would be really struggling to read between the lines. Something was just not write. What prevented Kaif from putting pen (or pencil) to paper throughout the last IPL season that left a completely blank notebook at the end of almost a 2 month campaign. Let’s examine it in the write earnest:-
 
Kaif was only pretending to write (just like playing the Air Guitar)
 
– He was distracted by how Ricky Ponting(Head Coach of Delhi Capitals), who he sat next to always in the dugout could chew on two things at the same time: gum and nails.
 
( As we know, Ricky has been stretching his ‘ gum se rishta ‘ for far too long)
 
– He was using a special type of invisible ink, visible only to no one, never to be noted!
 
– Between picking up Ricky‘s Tasmanian accent and Vijay Dahiya‘s ( another s’pport’ staff of Delhi Capitals) Sonipat(Haryana) one, he was hard pressed to fit in his Kanpur dialect
 
( BTW, in Delhi, the letter ‘ u ‘ in support is not needed, so kept it at bay, please don’t treat it as typo- u get the point right?)
 
– He was only making mental notes. The notebook was willy nilly merely a non contributing involuntary ally
 
– He was worried that in case he wrote anything, ‘ COACH tho log kahenge
 
– He had Writers Block and he was waiting for a Block Buster to start writing. And during Covid, there were none releasing
 
– Someone had read out the Write Act to him, hence he did not want to write
 
– There were no lines in the notebook, it was all blank. So, to maintain sanctity, he retained the original look. And didn’t cross the line
 
– He was afraid of Lead poisoning. So, he refused to pencil anything
 
– Being a very private person, he did not want to make his notary public
 
– He missed out the ‘special orientation‘ that Brendon McCullum had conducted for all coaching staff on how to write, how much to write, what to write etc during the IPL matches
 
– He was aware that the impulse to write things down is a peculiarly compulsive one, inexplicable to those who do not share it, useful only accidentally, only secondarily, in the way that any compulsion tries to justify itself
 
Later this evening we get to see Kaif yet again as Delhi Capitals take on Chennai Super Kings. And hopefully the ‘ notebook ‘ too. Unless, he has decided ‘not(e) again!’
 
” Our notebooks give us away, for however dutifully we record what we see around us, the common denominator of all we see is always, transparently, shamelessly, the implacable ‘I.’” —Joan Didion, “On Keeping a Notebook “.
 
Post Scriptum: I have nothing more to write!